Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
