so explain again why im purple
no
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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