Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
She said her name was "party"
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You Will Never Meet Anyone More Annoying Than These 23 People
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?