Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
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