So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
