yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
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