how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
