He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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