it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Randomize
