So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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