I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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