there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
