we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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