Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
