what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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