ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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