My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
