I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
