I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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