Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize
