we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
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Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
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I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I party with great urgency now.
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