Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
