Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
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