wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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