i was rollin on her like bob the builder
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
