I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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