I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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