I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
