So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.