It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize