that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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