thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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