Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
