idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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