oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
