just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Randomize
