After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
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