She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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