then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
