I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
