mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
