definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
