and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
