You really coming over, don't trick.
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Randomize
