how can u be prego again
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
