just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I have fence marks all over my body
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
