dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize