we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
