just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
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her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
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I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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