You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
